The Almost Infinitely Infamous Blog Of Rants, Annoyances, Fears And Irritations.

This is the blog that first started on Bebo, and gives me something to do, but due to blog length limitations and what-not I moved it here, for your and my ease. I will update as often as possible, but I definitely will write things down by hand over a period of say a week and type all of my entries up here. Enjoy!

And yes, there are repeats, I know. Don’t keep telling me in comments. It’s useless to me.

1)The “sexuality” drop down boxes don’t provide for asexuals.

2)People arguing over the pronunciation of scone.

3)No matter how hard I try I can’t reverse my insanity.

4)People who call orange squash “juice”.

5)No matter how much respect I show someone, I’ll always get hit by them or such like at some point.

6)People that think the things I say aren’t real sayings.

7)That Sainsbury’s class onions as fruits.

8)That 25 slices of “Best of Both” provides all the calories you need for a day.

9)People that say they’re in love but don’t care when it fails.

10)Mushrooms.

11)There’s never any lightning when I need it.

12)That octopuses isn’t octopi.

13)That I have no idea what “Frito’s” are.

14)Converting masses of people to join you is harder than it sounds.

15)Pineapple rings.

16)Women.

17)That Geoff thinks I enjoy being in public places.

18)That no matter how much chocolate I eat it never has a detrimental effect.

19)Many of my memories are only accessible with music.

20)Dreams that stalk your consciousness both day and night.

21)Boredom stalks you like a ninja.

22)That after the boredom you do something embarrassing, which is often caught on some kind of film.

23)False memories.

24)No matter what, you will never be loved as much as you were when you were a child.

25)Clunky sentences.

26)Simultaneous equations.

27)Hormonal imbalances that confuse me as to the gender of a person.

28)Special triangles and radians.

29)That MSN still insists the server is up and down at the same time.

30)People who take what I say out of context.

31)People who ask how you are but don’t reply when you ask the same question to them.

32)That men will always be accused of sexism when women are just as vicious.

33)People who say that I’ve broken my nose.

34)That whenever I have a nosebleed the only thing I have on my person is a sock, but for other people I have a mass of paper.

35)That syrup and bread crystallizes the bread but the addition of butter to prevent crystallization makes it sickly.

36)People whose muscles ripple under translucent skin.

37)None of my schemes come into fruition.

38)People ignore that which is special.

39)Ignorance which causes people to criticize my chosen way of life.

40)The PS3.

41)People who couldn’t give a damn asking how you are.

42)Mosquitoes.

43)That a rel really is only 0.2 seconds.

44)Cans of beer hidden under your mattress that you can blatantly feel on school trips.

45)The constant vulnerability that you feel on a public toilet.

46)Believing, as a squirrel looks directly into your eyes, that it is looking into your soul, when in fact it is trying to determine if you have any nuts to give it.

47)Being yelled at in a foreign language in a foreign country.

48)When your old friend who was always better than you at everything is still better than you at everything.

49)That so far I’m the youngest person on the JoCo forums and everyone else is in their mid-twenties onwards.

50)When your scanner refuses to let me select what you want to scan so detail is lost.

51)Feeling neurotic for patting the grease off your pizza with a napkin.

52)The fake road scenery in car scenes in old films.

53)When your girlfriend *snicker*, who is sitting on your lap asks if she’s crushing your legs, and she is.

54)Arguments over whether the cup is half full or empty when you can just drink the water and remove the issue.

55)Listening to someone play an instrument they can’t play and then they ask what you thought of it.

56)That tornadoes rarely kill or injure the people chasing them.

57)Bacon will never be considered a vegetable.

58)People that insist Saddam Hussein was a kind and just leader.

59)Realising that having such a long list of irritations and rants makes you a bad person.

60)That no matter how neatly you wrap your headphones around your MP3 player, the moment it goes in your pocket it tangles.

61)Hayfever.

62)People who play their music so loud you can hear it but insist they can’t hear it (Pay attention Ben….).

63)Trying to get women to dislike me either makes them like me or just not hate me, therefore logically if I try to make them like me they’ll hate me but that would defeat the object of my life….

64)That I don’t have the ability to manipulate space and time and all the things within them.

65)Men (by request of Louise)

66)That 65) exists.

67)That I generally feel uncomfortable during social situations but without them I feel really depressed.

68)Coughing so hard in a public place that your sick.

69)That I can never see the hilarity of this number….

70)The perpetual feeling of regret and dissapointment that follows me like my shadow.

71)People who enter the realm of physical contact with people they don’t know or aren’t family/business partners.

72)The idea that you have to use “an” in front of any word beginning with “h” the only time this is gramattically acceptable is “an h”.

73)That black people are allowed to use a certain forbidden word without punishment but white people aren’t. (As shown by Big Brother)

74)People who automatically associate physical affection with sex.

75)People who call me naive, I’m not! I’m just oblivious.

76)Schools that give you the wrong exam time.

77)Cake that stays in your hair.

78)A certain woman that won’t stop causing arguments and pronouncing more words incorrectly than I do.

79)The number of vehicles that try to run me over in populated areas.

80)That Big Brother keeps adding more men, they’re ruining the idea of a sex free house!

81)Big Brother gives 30 seconds to leave the house but everyone takes 5 minutes.

82)That all of the skins of Bebo always have patches that make what’s written impossible to read.

83)Jonathan Coulton.com won’t load.

84)That Stan Lee is in Spider Man 3.

85)The surprisingly large number of places that upset me.

86)That any time I go near the Queen the best view I have is through the reflection of a camera on someones trousers, due to someone on my shoulders.

87)Invitations that mean your answer either makes you seem desperate or ungrateful.

88)Invitations you can’t quite trust the actual invitation-ness of.(Whether it is a serious invitation or a joke).

89)That I can’t figure out what day it is…

90)That Wheelie shoes and leaf blowers are not an acceptable mode of transport.

91)The uncanny knack I have for getting into uncomfortable situations.

92)That I come up with really good things to put here and as soon as I get ready to type I forget it.

93)Television that criticises your intelligence.

94)The way my head and chest feel during most of the day.

95)The amount of time I spend on this blog instead of “socialising” or finding a job on site.

96)That I can see no use for the Mandelbrot Set.

97)That Chris stole my idea for a blog, although I am referenced in it.

98)That the book “738 Annoying Things” contains more than 738 things.

99)The way in which I react to any form of compliment or social nicety.

100)People that throw clean washing onto the floor resulting in you having to wash it again at the cost of £3.

101)The apparent reluctantness of people providing measurements purely because I used the word Eugenics.

102)A 176 Meg file downloading at 33b/s

103)The obsession I suddenly have with my F5 key.

104)That I fear success and failure, and also solitude and companionship.

105)People that believe in love at first sight.(IT’S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE)

106)The sudden increase in mental blackouts.

107)That I can’t physically cry.

108)People who don’t bend over backwards for someone.

109)The period of time between hitting your toe and feeling the pain.

110)The unshakeable feeling that you’re missing out on something in life and therefore wasting it.

111)Shirts that look inside out, but aren’t.

112)Loose skin after you burn your mouth.

113)That for the last month and a half I have been unable to sleep between 5 a.m. and 11 p.m.

114)Realising, as you scroll through a list of old school people, that you were unpopular then and even more unpopular now.

115)People that think I am heartless for having no sympathy for Madelaine’s parents.

116)The idea that Utopia exists.

117)That I can only have a proper and deep conversation with Jasmin (dog).

118)Hot Chocolate that looks like mud and tastes worse.

119)Overly affectionate physical displays of emotion in public places.

120)Having to spend 5 hours in town with only £3 after buying books.

121)A certain number that seems to follow me. (Ack! It’s here as well!!)

122)Recognising someone from a long time ago instantaneously, but they don’t recognise you till 3 hours later causing you to wonder whether it’s who you think it is.

123)That Bebo won’t let me edit my blog because it says I’m not authorised.

124)When you can’t help bumping into people but they accuse you of stalking them….(Mills….)

125)That if the male sex drive portion of the brain is 2.5 times bigger than a woman’s where the hell am I, because if it’s there it ain’t working.

126)That reading a book about the female brain is manipulating me and my mysogonism is waning-therefore a fundamental part of me missing.

127)Samuel L. Jackson.

128)The mysterious effect chick-flicks have on people.

129)People who have a fanatical devotion for actors and actresses which means they see any films involving them.

130)Continuously walking into walls and people.

131)When you feel a certain way about someone but they feel completely different about you. (And there was me thinking I was finally better)

132)The sinking feeling right before an emotional or mental fall.

133)That you can’t order blogs on this blasted site.

134)The increase in a chasm that I can see within my family.

135)Double negatives.

136)Puberty. It just has no good come of it.

137)Peer Pressure.

138)People who demand you give 110% but rarely go beyond 80% themselves.

139)The way my brian reacts to situations and the way it generally attempts to work.

140)That something that has confused me for a while has now been answered by a book that I generally wouldn’t have read.

141)People who look for codes in old books and works of art.

142)People that over analyze a poem and can’t accept that the literary meaning may well be the only intended one.

143)How getting chocolate spread from a jar with a knife is inexplicably difficult.

144)That if I get a job it’d be during weekday days, leaving me only available in evenings, and whose ever heard of evening socialisation?

145)That at certain times of the month my spelling and grammar go out the window.

146)Arguements over what the P in PMS stands for-It’s a cycle! It can be post or pre depending on where in the cycle you focus, either where the oestrogen rises (week 1 and 2)or the oestrogen is lowest, (week 3/4).(The former would be pre the latter post)

147)When the timeout for comments says “-1 Minutes ago” that’s impossible on 2 counts, 1-that’s the future, 2-it’s in the plural.

148)People who whisper behind their hand making it obvious they’re talking about you.

149)The childline adverts with a doll that actually make me feel less inclined to help them.

150)Free IQ tests that won’t give you your esults without a charge.

151)That shopping is always harder to put in a trolley once it’s been bagged.

152)Headaches that don’t go away after 6 paracetamols and 2 litres of water.

153)Pointless questions like “If progesterone decreases sex drive, what would happen if you injected it into someone with no drive, would it somehow create a negative sex drive?”

154)Superficial people.

155)People that worship superficial people.(Completely different)

156)People who think I’d get castrated, why would I do that? That means that I think I might actually have sex, I’m not that weak….

157)Things I can’t fill in on an application form.

158)Combo platters that don’t have a lot of choice.

159)Single people that have a double bed.

160)My bed (1.5 ft wide).

161)Vest shirts.

162)Children on public transport who insist on shouting questions about everything they see till they get an answer, and then they see something else.

163)Marble chocolate. (This is white chocolate mixed in a marble effect with milk chocolate)

164)That even if I can get a mentos into a Diet Coke bottle and close it before it sprays everywhere there is no real advantage.

165)The amount of money I spent on confectionary last year.

166)That considering how much money I’ve lent or thrown in the last 5 years doesn’t bother me.

167)TV hosts that make it blatantly obvious that there’s a break on it’s way by their actions and comments but still see the need to say “And here’s a break”.

168)People that don’t label music correctly.

169)Power cuts.

170)The sudden inexplicable population increase 9 months after a power cut.

171)Meatfree Hot Dogs.

172)That hotdogs come in tins of a different number than hot dog buns, forcing you to choose between too many buns or sausages.

173)People that complain about my lists.

174)Christmas lights in June.

175)That the Civic Centre building is now listed.

176)McDonalds.

177)That Bebo gets confused with comments when you open too many in new tabs.

178)The great difficulty in making domes in ProDesktop.

179)That America has a document allowing minors to sign away they’re baby. Do they not realise how much that screws with their heads?

180)The song “You Are My Sunshine”.

181)Death.

182)My twitches.

183)Those Channel 4 adverts that take a long time to end and only show a 4 for less than a second.

184)Mirrors.

185)People who lick food out of spite.

186)Chaos.

187)Bandanas.

188)Peach stones.

189)Arrogant nuns.

190)Uncomfortable conversations that your conscience says you MUST have so that you are supportive and not considered impolite.

191)When you think you’re being followed but you don’t want to turn around for fear of looking a pillock if there’s no-one, or terrified to see that you are.

192)That the most intimate contact I will share with 99.9% if non family members is a handshake.

193)Even if I wanted to mentality and perception can not be easily changed.

194)That giant metal boxes interfere with my internet signal meaning it’s not as fast as it could be.

195)When you get the feeling someone blatantly isn’t noticing something so you point it out and they say they knew and you feel pathetic.

196)The smell of vomit.

197)That tastes get embedded into foods when cooked so even if people say that they’ve removed it, you can still taste it.

198)Having to have a Marine suit pinned onto you while standing on a table so that you are a pageboy.

199)Realising you have no money two weeks before your Mum’s birthday.

200)Knowing that both pasty and pastie are acceptable but still thinking that you have spelt it wrong.

201)Human nature.

202)Zone Alarm.

203)The floaty things that appear when I move my eyes.

204)How hard it is to make an accurate Mii.

205)That I don’t know what TATACACATATCCTCGT is.

206)The sound “muah” or variations thereof.

207)Not knowing what to do when someone starts crying.

208)Any dessert I make myself becomes a laxative.

209)Cafes that close for lunch.

210)Extremes of emotion.

211)Not being able to see the advantage of the fourth finger.

212)That the song “Mandelbrot Set” does not tell you where the b comes from in z1=bz^2+c.

213)Sex.

214)Cucumbers.

215)Evian.

216)Not being able to find a use for A6 sheets of card.

217)The amount of time it takes to reply to a comment/message on Bebo.

218)That all smart and witty people have very similar handwriting, and it doesn’t look like mine.

219)That because I uninstalled something the computer keeps crashing so we’d have to get it fixed but it comes under user error so is not part of the guarantee.

220)Making decisions that should really be very easy to make, but instead taking three weeks over them.

221)That while in town on Thursday for some reason I noticed that bikinis were sold in seperate parts. WHAT THE HELL!!!

222)That 221 was actually added.

223)That I find the “romantic” comics on xkcd.com the most funny.

224)That I always refresh forum pages at the wrong time.

225)The great difficulty of editing comments.

226)Strawberries that go mouldy one day after the expiration date.

227)Young love.

228)That throughout your childhood you were told that you shouldn’t eat mouldy things. Then you are introduced to blue cheeses.

229)That most comments I post derail an entire thread for up to a week.

230)Remembering the holidays where you got contact details off holiday friends then feeling guilty for not getting in contact. Then feeling that to write now would be worse.

231)First impressions.

232)That I can’t practice my Gollum voice because Ben get’s in a hissy fit.

233)Having no idea why people say “Pardon my french”.

234)Knowing that scallops have 35 blue eyes but not how to react in a social situation.

235)Website Time-Outs.

236)Finding out things are a lot closer than you thought they were.

237)How viewing screenshots in a slideshow format can get confusing.

238)Seagulls.

239)Typographical errors.

240)The amount of time it takes for postcards to get to their recipient.

241)Waking up at 4 a.m. and then subsequently waking up every five minutes but not wanting to get out of bed even though you know you won’t get to sleep again.

242)American cities that have the same name as english ones, or that simply have a “new” in front of them.

243)Prosthetics.

244)That political correctness only works one way.

245)Not knowing whether in the long term it’s better to make someone else happy or yourself.

246)People with big eyes. (e.g. Alex B, Myleene Klass)

247)The effect of alcohol on the human brain.

248)That while eating six tubs of clotted cream may be delicious, it is bad for you.

249)Pins and Needles.

250)Seals.

251)Dreams in which large periods of time pass and they are so realistic that you are convinced it has actually happened, thus utterly confusing you.

252)Falling asleep in the middle of the day, waking up at 5 and thinking it’s 5 the next.

253)When you slam a door in protest but the door takes so long to close that the meaning is lost.

254)Arrogant creationists.

255)Dams.

256)Serial killers that work for the police.

257)Regrets.

258)Carol Vordeman.

259)People that believe in Divine Intervention but not in (a) God/god/gods.

260)That Holland & Barrett always have a sale on.

261)Sheila’s Wheels adverts.

262)Rooms that have no clocks in them.

263)Mysterious blood stains on my hands.

264)Not knowing if Jasmin is okay as she twitches madly in her sleep or if she’s just dreaming again.

265)Addiction to a machine.

266)The high pitched shrieking that is outside certain shops in Drake Circus.

267)Jehovah’s witnesses.(Apologies to any who read this, but you are irritating)

268)People that think a virgin birth is logically impossible.

269)Star Trek.

270)That the smell of oily fish stays on your hands for hours/days.

271)That 2mm can make the difference between a wireless connection working and not working.

272)Tom Cruise.

273)Cramps.

274)Musicals.

275)Knees.

276)Skateboarders.

277)That the Toclafene look small most of the time, but they are the size of a watermelon.

278)The realisation that my chosen life is a result of my knowledge of my obsessive tendencies.

279)People that spell tiny with two n’s.

280)Irrationality.

281)Migraines.

282)Car accidents.

283)Hotmail.

284)The way that my threads gain a lot of posts very quickly but that after the first 2 weeks they are left to rust.

285)Plasticene.

286)The temptation to pop bubble wrap.

287)Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?.

288)Giant pasties that suddenly taste of fish after being in your bag for 2 hours.

289)Heart attacks.

290)That people don’t believe your heart can actually break.

291)The sudden increase in saliva just before eating.

292)Centrifugal force.

293)That the channel islands are nearer to France but they’re British.

294)Having no idea why BBC, ITV and C4 are making a big deal about the empire.

295)Smoke alarm shrieks.

296)Psychiatrists that nod a lot and say “And how does that make you feel”.

297)The amount of things you actually have to give up in a compromise.

298)MySpace.

299)That my wireless thingy still doesn’t let me play online.

300)That this film would’ve been a lot better were CG not used so much.

301)That I’m only missing 3 heart pieces but the fortune teller is showing me 5 places.

302)Trying to find 9 Poe Souls.

303)Internet speed of 0Kbps.

304)Mini-skirts, Micro-skirts and variations thereof.

305)My inability to cook a sausage thoroughly.

306)Newspaper sellers that push their cabinet things into you.

307)Never knowing how to put out an oil fire.

308)The simplicity of a miniature steam cannon is evident, but it’s still not plausible.

309)Hip Hop.

310)Fluroescent bulbs.

311)Chocolate Milkshakes.

312)Euphemisms.

313)The sudden increase in volume during the adverts.

314)Clipping or catching your nails, just a tad too far.

315)Getting held up by security because the station ticket dispenser was out of order and the conductor ignored your requests for a ticket.

316)The distinct lack of caffeine or natural anti-sleep chemicals in food or the house.

317)When someone asks you to tell the truth so you do, but the truth is so insane they think you’re lying.

318)When after many weeks something terrible happens and someone gets angry because you didn’t tell them the truth but you did.

319)Unwittingly repeating yourself.

320)The fine line which proportion gives of a drawing either being acceptable or obscene and offensive.

321)Not being able to sleep because you have something on your mind, but not knowing for the life of you what it is.

322)When trying to plan something makes you blow everything out of proportion.

323)Sprite.

324)What I see in the mirror.

325)That the only way I can draw hands is tracing my own then scanning and shrinking the image.

326)That humans can’t utilise stress, worry and weddings as a viable energy source/supply.

327)Not knowing whether fire is a solid liquid or gas.

328)When keys are so close together if you make a mistake you change the meaning of the whole word. Alternatively you type so fast that the order is made incorrect changing the meaning.(Louise reminded me of it…)

329)Popularity Contests.

330)The speed at which my video and digital camera drain battery power.

331)Birds.

332)Being stuck for inviting people over because I don’t know if Ben is going to be there or not.

333)Mistaking the ; for the ‘.

334)The distinct lack of melted chocolate in my immediate vacinity.

335)Seeing things that aren’t there.

336)That according to the rule one should say “an usual ….” but because that is sooooo hard to say we use “a usual….” thus breaking a grammatical rule.

337)Sand in your shoes.

338)Reaching down a hole in the kitchen to try and get the butter you knocked down and coming across something wet and sticky.

339)That Starbucks don’t give you your coffee as you pay for it, you have to go to a seperate counter.

340)That when you get your coffee, it tastes more of milk than coffee.

341)Knowing that without trying I can get A’s and B’s but worrying that because I did try I might have made more mistakes getting me only C’s and D’s.

342)Not knowing where I get my calcium from.

343)Very large coffee cups.

344)When people leave the room to have a phone conversation so that you can’t hear them, but you can still hear them.

345)That jewelery (is that right?) shop in Drake Circus that shrieks.

346)That “Octopus” isn’t free anymore.

347)The distress that oxytocin causes after a break-up.

348)That if I don’t read a book for a week I forget what was said previously.

349)That IF I were to have children I would use them for psychological experimentation.

350)Limitations on social interactions at home set by my brother.

351)That just because my phone is being held together by tape, my Mum thinks I should get a new one.

352)The concern that eating sausages two weeks over the use by date will kill you.

353)How commercialised Easter has become.

354)That my hand is too big to be used in my drawings since when it is scaled down it loses data.

355)Being in a room where you are expected to know the most on a particular subject, and you’ve never heard of it.

356)That Big Brother is still on TV.

357)Hoping you’ve scared someone away, but they turn up on your doorstep 10 minutes later.

358)That even when I’m being critical people say I’m being kind.

359)The way that this blog can grow by 20 entries in the space of 3 hours and then do nothing for 2 weeks.

360)The 360. (See what I did there?)

361)Not knowing what the correct term is if something can move through 360 degrees across the horizontal, the vertical, and all other axes.

362)That the staring at the sun doesn’t make you blind, it just makes purple splodges appear.

363)AIDS/HIV.

364)Having to catch up on forums where a lot is said after you haven’t been able to get there for two days.

365)20 Questions.

366)The randomness of everything.

367)The length of my Blog title.

368)The questions that I try to find an answer to when I’m bored.

369)Fickle people.370)When you get pins and needles without the tingling and just the inability to move a limb.

371)People that look nothing like what people suggest-some people will know who I’m on about.

372)The limit of space in a blog comment.

373)Not knowing what blog means.

374)Not understandng why EKMO (is that right?) poses a higher risk of brain bleeding than not being on EKMO.

375)Not knowing whether people are actually reading this so that it is worthwhile me continuing.

376)That even if people aren’t reading I’m carrying on anyway.

377)The amount of time it takes for my hair to dry.

378)That no-one is symmetrical.

379)Chat-up lines.

380)That the edit function for the blog is at the end.

381)Tapeworms.

382)People that don’t accept babies as parasites.

383)Werewolves.

384)That I can’t pronounce “Coulton” properly.

385)People that leave the toilet seat up.

386)How cheap lemonade acts as a powerful laxative.

387)Friend stories.

388)People that put salt in the sugar pot.

389)Mould.

390)Pudding skin, also found on custard.

391)Colds.

392)When Bebo gets confused over who’s account I’m viewing.

393)Chain mail.

394)The emoticon adverts.

395)Not knowing when to use whom.

396)Never knowing when or why to use a semi-colon.

397)Theological debates that deteriorate into brawls.

398)That we don’t have SSBB yet.

399)The smell of hairspray.

400)When it’s hot and humid.

401)The smell of sour milk.

402)How poorly Kerrin and I are doing at creating a UK JoCo advertising campaign.

403)Cheese carvers.

404)The cost of the 2012 Olympics.

405)That having imaginary friends is actually better for your developing social interaction than real people.

406)The number of posts that get lost due to a crashing page.

407)The French.

408)President George W. Bush Jr.

409)Disembodied voices.

410)That no-one has thought to take all the Tour de France cyclists, take one of the wheelsoff their bikes and attaching it to a dynamo, producing clean energy.

411)That no-one teaches you how to organise a funeral.

412)TV shows where someones inner monologue is shown to be external. (Malcolm in the Middle)

413)Scientology.

414)The growing urge to eat 3 tins of syrup.

415)Dry retching.

416)Pringles tubes that make it almost impossible to reach the bottom without getting your hand stuck.

417)The amount of stuff I bought at Mrs Anstee’s stall.4

18)The heart piece in Faron Woods that I’ve technically already gotten but still get shown the fog by Fanadi.

419)The creepy things Princess Agitha says.

420)Cherries.

421)Hayfever.

422)That Red Vs Blue is no more.

423)That when trying to call Moe’s Tavern I was connected to somewhere in Iceland.

424)Dry Muffins.

425)Chewy Doritos.

426)Shopping at Morrisons.

427)Catherine Tate.

428)Comics that are being turned into films.

429)Sciatica and Arthritis.

430)That as soon as you get a heart transplant the rules of football change for you.

431)The amount of time I waste trying to understand what Sims are saying.

432)The amount of times I have to repeat myself for people to understand.

433)Simon Cowell.

434)The X Factor.

435)Arrogant people.

436)What I let myself in for.

437)That while you shouldn’t start a sentence with “and” it seems to be getting harder and harder not to do.

438)THe feeling that my life choices will make it rougher than I’d have hoped.

439)The prospect of being in an old folks home.

440)People who have 10 kids just for the benefits so they don’t have to work.

441)That paracetamol seems to disappear when I need it most.

442)Sonic and the Secret Rings.

443)Insatiable curiosity.

444)Billie Piper.

445)My last history exam.

446)The difficulty of drawing the Doctor Who title thing with Jon instead of Doctor.

447)Microwave meals.

448)How inefficient my video camera battery is.

449)Barry Scott.

450)That I don’t have a roller ball mouse anymore.

451)Worrying that I’ll be in school when JoCo comes to England.

452)Jeremy Clarkson.

453)The Matrix Trilogy.

454)IncrediMail.

455)Fungi.

456)The entry that won the PopSci Song contest.

457)The Queen.

458)Cats.

459)Soft rock.

460)The pornography industry.

461)People that support the pornography industry.

462)That I no longer have a dinging clock at home.

463)Alcohol.

464)Never knowing how I beat Tiffin.

465)Henry and Dom.

466)Dick and Dom.

467)White noise.

468)That I can’t liquidise an apple.

469)Shuffle functions that don’t actually shuffle.

470)The feeling that I’m wasting my time.

471)The number of times I’ve said time in this blog. Time time time…

472)That the further through this list the more I seem to be adding useless tidbits to points.

473)Worrying about how much I can write before the blog crashes.

474)The taste of Aquafresh.

475)The difficulty of not punching Glazier in the face every time I see it.

476)Knowing I could commit the perfect murder, but having no one I want dead.

478)Wondering how long it is before someone accuses me of cyber-bullying and my account is removed.

479)Political correctness.

480)Dalek Caan.

481)Those high-pitched chipmunk things.

482)Quantum computers.

483)Reading this myself.

484)Pseudo-fruits.

485)That in the case of old theatres the more expensive seats have less leg room.

486)The appendix.

487)The speed at which I type isn’t the same as I see and think resulting in quick typing but a lot of errors.

488)The idea that the voice in my head that acts as my thoughts that sounds like me, probably isn’t even real.

489)The Size 0 debate.

490)12A ratings that mean 12 no longer exists so under 12’s can watch te film provided they are with an adult.

491)Censorship that makes it more obvious what was removed.

492)The small amount of mail I receive.

493)Nicotine.

494)Looking back at the things I’ve been obsessed/addicted to.

495)Street dancers.

496)Il Divo.

497)People that say they’ll call but don’t, meaning you wasted a day inside waiting for a call.

498)The number of people I can find.

499)When as you do something on a regular basis your joy for it is sucked out of you.

500)That I finally got to 500 entries but really don’t feel as though I have acheived anything.

501)Pop-ups that tell you they can get rid of pop-ups.

502)Ads that say “YOU ARE THE 999,999,999th VISITOR!!!CONGRATULATIONS!!CLICK HERE FOR YOUR PRIZE”.

503)Questions like “Do girls make better fighters”.

504)Immediately after making a decision wondering if I made the wrong choice.

505)Insultingly simple competition questions.

506)People who ask “What are you thinking right now” just as you’ve come up with a perfect surprise birthday present.

507)Hitchhikers.

508)That trees take so long to go.

509)How much Chris knows how I think. (Sort of)

510)Sneezing fits.

511)Ascorbic acid.

512)Being disturbed at the number of blue lights in my house.

513)That British Comedy is the best, but in decline.

514)Wii-related puns.

515)Harry Potter.

516)That as soon as I log out of the JoCo forums the number of posts leaps to an average of 10, but while I’m on it’s lucky to get 1 in the time of an hour.

517)How pathetic this has become.

518)Two-faced people-You too Shad….

519)That web-messengers don’t tell me when someone logs out.

520)Flies.

521)The amount of trouble a few numbers can cause.

522)Navi.

523)Tatl.

524)When, after a long day at work you go shopping in a mall which is suddenly attacked by zombies, and you get an e-mail that sings form an annoying co-worker that has also become a zombie and attempts to persuade you to let them in.(This one <b><u>WILL</u></b> go but I was bored and listening to a song)

525)The way the pop-up system works on ONM.

526)That the JoCo fan submission page doesn’t seem to search properly.

527)The terror of seeing myself as a 50 year old.

528)Busted.

529)S Club.

530)Most of the other stuff Ben likes.

531)When Ben takes my DS games. After saying he wants to sell his DS for a PSP. (Good luck to him I say…)

532)The suspicion that my Mum and Dad only married because Mum was pregnant with me.

533)How long it takes to create an army of fans.

534)Slinkys.

535)Rubiks Cubes.

536)How the Tube is never efficiently used because people don’t file down into the aisles.

537)When your ears pop.

538)How hot the Tube is.

539)Paranoia.

540)That logically by the end of September/Mid October I will have reached 1000 entries, and still feel how I do right now.

541)How much I miss and regret taking Diazepam.

542)DVD discs that go missing.

543)Love-sick people. (Get over it, it’s hormone withdrawl)

544)Being asked to do one thing, then half way through that being asked to do something else, and as you start to do that they get angry at you for leaving one thing so as you go back to the first thing they get angry for leaving the second thing.

545)Designer babies.

546)Lasagne, that has no meat in it.

548)The speed at which I come down with illnesses.

549)That generally I feel very uncomfortable in situations unless I have been in the same situation at least twice, or I have read up in a book for a long time.

550)Silica gel sachets.

551)Twitchy fingers.

552)That I would love to start another scarf but I’ve lost my knitting needles and wool. (Maybe I’ll buy some on Thursday…)

553)When your DVD player starts doing stuff it’s not meant to.

554)How sinister or creepy nice things can sound when I say them.

555)That Sky keeps changing channel numbers.

556)How little I actually know about anything.

557)How I wish I was more easy in social situations but still fear the repercussions too greatly.

558)Differentiation (to a degree).

559)Yeah, just Love.

560)That twilight is the time when skies are clearest and things begin to look beautiful again, but no-one else is awake.

561)That fusion takes energy in, but in the case of hydrogen it puts out. In the case of anything up to Iron it puts more energy out than it takes in (apparently).

562)Nails that catch on every piece of clothing.

563)No-one is reading my ONM post but me.

564)Lacrimosa.

565)Out of date custard.

566)The smell that emanates from our fridge.

567)Cold feet.

568)That apparently after 4 days and nights without sleep you gain a level of higher consciousness but I fall during the fourth night.

569)Realising that as this gets bigger I will have more and more to proof read.

570)That the spell-checker can’t cope with this blog because it’s too big.

571)That the only sport I didn’t get second place in was swimming, and I was the eldest there with the longest arms and nothing better to do but swim a mile.

572)Not knowing whether a piano is percussion or strings.

573)Basoons.

574)Colloquialisms.

575)That the grades students at DHSB have gotten seems to be declining slowly.

576)Having a cut either between the fingers or on the end of the thumb.

578)Bee/Wasp stings.

579)When I have to be the answer person of freaky new version 20 questions.

580)Having to explain my answers to the game.

581)Tamborines.

582)That while I’d like an accordian, it’d be impractical to own and no-one could teach me it’s fine art.

583)Electric shocks.

584)What most telescopes are used for.

585)Feeling slightly freaked by the number of angels in the living room.

586)Perfume that you buy to later realise it was stolen.

587)Not being able to keep a walking stick just because it has a metal head and vaguely resembles an axe.

588)Customs.

589)Not knowing how the three colour toothpaste comes out in the right way even if you’ve completely screwed up the tube.

590)Wondering how many trees I could kill if I continue this for 3 years and then print it.

591)The difficulty of plotting a graph to show the rate of item adding.

592)That stacking shelves was a lot easier before you lost an arm.

593)That most bullies seem to be highly succesful later in life.

594)Tomatoes that get waterlogged in their gro-bag.

595)That the only thing to survive the heavy rain was the parsley which has grown like there’s no tomorrow.

596)That technically there is no tomorrow.

597)The idea of Atlantis.

598)The Amygdala.

599)Cutting your thumb while trying to open a tub of lasagne whilst almost throwing a hot plate onto your foot.

600)That while you all slept I actually stayed up to post 200 items in the space of 10 hours or so.

601)Exploding lava lamps.

602)Footballers.

603)Bluetooth.

604)That my phone should have infra-red but it doesn’t work.

605)When you really have nothing better to do than view the profile’s of friends of friends of friends.

606)Forcive rhyming.

607)When what you see whirls around you.

608)Smoke puffs.

609)Animoyles.

610)When your mum’s car battery goes flat.

611)That eating a large tub of nutella wasn’t as good an idea as I thought it might.

612)Antihistimine.

613)The aftertaste of Zopiclone.

614)Wondering what would happen if I took 10 cow chromosomes, 6 human ones, 20 from a shark, 5 from a newt and 5 from a bat.

615)Urban Legends Revealed.

616)That if you weren’t deaf and had a weak heart, our stereo system might just kill you.

617)That spaghetti and elastic bands can’t hold my hair up to make me ridiculously tall.

618)How actors act out a heart-attack.

619)That cyanide is present in apples.

620)The number of typographical errors on the Hyrule.net Wiki pages.

621)That I can’t draw the end of branches

622)The increasing number of floating spiders.

623)That I can induce cramp by putting my leg in the right place.

624)The increasing difficulty to check for repeats.

625)That I’ve lost an entry I want to change amongst all of these.

626)The dinging noise of pearls in Sonic.

627)Wondering if Chris deliberately directed me to the Wiki pages so that this wouldn’t grow so rapidly.

628)Later realising that I’m so sad they’d both get done.

629)When you come up with a great solution to a problem which is disregarded, and the idea taken fails. After much deliberation your idea is used successfully and someone else gets the credit.

630)Being told to do something you already know how to do.

631)Biting your cheek where it has swollen after previous bitings.

632)How uneasy I feel going into a shop that sells the item I own and currently hold in my hand.

633)Knowing enough of a foreign language to know you’re being talked about but not enough to know what they’re saying.

634)Freezer burn.

635)When you try to watch TV and someone nearby keeps singing.

636)That because no-one leaves comments anymore I have no idea whether this is being read.

637)How overpowered Dry Bones is in Mario Strikers Charged Football.

638)The differences between the real world and the internet.

639)When your cousin keeps asking whether you have a girlfriend yet.

640)How addictive Katamari music is.

641)Blue shells.

642)How ineffective webmessengers are.

643)That there is no logical opposite for flammable.

644)People that are always happy.

645)Bugs Bunny.

646)Elmo.

647)Going blind.

648)People who try to hide that they are having sex by quickly playing tennis on the Wii-you know who you are…-_-

649)The apparent addiction I have to the following symbol .

650)People who think I have an old/wise soul.

651)The difficulty in transporting neodymium magnets.

652)That there is no way to invite people to the JoCo Fan Group.

653)People with irritating laughs.

654)That ONM gave out free magnets but I have no magnetic surfaces.

655)How quickly available summer space is disappearing.

656)The difficulty of finding the jeep music from Red Vs Blue.

657)When you spend hours doing something to make someone happy and then either they hate it or they don’t turn up.

658)When you have a feeling you can’t explain to someone else.

659)How far behind the live stream I am on the Hyrule.net radio.

660)How lame I am at choosing birthday presents.

661)How uncomfortable you feel when you know you’re being watched and you feel the need to talk.

662)Writing a load of rubbish so I can reach the numbers I want.

663)Knowing I should replace No. 524) but lacking the motivation to think of something and go back to edit it.

664)That Harry Potter didn’t end how I wanted it to.

665)How much I suck at making crumble.

666)The devil.

667)How slow the online communities have been this last week.

668)When I can’t get on to Bebo or JoCoFo very easily.

669)When you spend 20 minutes trying on blazers that don’t fit and then realise the reason they don’t fit is because they’re girls blazers.

670)How I spend my “free” time.

671)When you get so nervous or excited your heart actually stops for 30 seconds. (It hurts…)

672)People who don’t like pie/pi.

673)Chest pains.

674)Films that make you feel more paranoid about things you don’t expect to be paranoid of.

675)When after a day in town you think that you have sucessfully avoided being seen by anyone you know, only to be seen by people at the station.

676)The paradox of how my mind survives.

677)That of the aproximate 6000 things a human thinks of a day, it has thout 5998 of them at some point in it’s life.

678)Cancer.

679)That spider-pig can’t swing from a web because he’s a pig.

680)How illogical a stork carrying babies is.

681)When you forget it’s someones birthday and you only remember because they say “I have to go, birthday stuff”.

682)How hard it is to draw in paint with a touchpad.

683)Sour-cream.

684)Realising how much you actually were addicted to something when you look back at it.

685)Wondering if God or the devil believe they exist.

686)Alaska.

687)That in all the pieces of music for the Simpsons movie, part of the Simpsons theme is there somewhere.

688)When you spend all day cleaning and you’re told it’s still not clean enough.

689)When the Sony search engine intervenes half way through a page loading and says the page does not exist.

690)That even though a 360 attacked someone in Transformers, people still buy them.

691)When you watch a film trailer and realise you are most like the really nerdy person later shown to use a fake ID to buy alcohol, talked to by the police who later take him away and let him fire a gun.

692)Wondering if, as soon as I turn 16, my mind will break.(This thought occurs to me each year)

693)Knowing you will encounter withdrwal symptoms makes you more determined not to quit.

694)Cheesestrings.

695)When letters are replaced with symbols.

696)Sheila’s Wheels ads.

697)That my room is used to dump anything that doesn’t have a proper place and my mum gets angry when it gets cluttered.

698)People that say I’m disorganized, I’m just organized in a different way.

699)Permanant marker that washes away.

700)The realisation that due to page crashes and unaccepted updates how many entries have been lost.

701)That certain tracks of the Simpsons Movie Soundtrack are labelled incorrectly.

702)That you can’t fold paper more than 13 times.

703)How much useless stuff I know.

704)Worrying that if you sneeze too hard you will expel your stomach after eating almost a kilogram of crumble.

705)That the head of my ship doesn’t think I can go for five minutes without blowing something up.

706)Knowing you’ve heard a piece of music but no idea where (Same for faces, except you see those not hear them)

707)How hard I’m trying to make this slightly amusing to those of you that still read this.

708)The concept of “i”.

709)The difference a day really does make.

710)Beggars.

711)Police that think I’m a hooligan for cleaning a street of beer bottles.

712)Tapeworms.

713)Failed high fives.

714)Flinching when someone starts a high five.

715)Betrayal fives.

716)How painful anything below or on the nose is.

717)Not knowing what you look like when you sleep in public.

718)When you try to annoy someone, and succeed greatly, and then feel guilty.

719)How much my right calf muscle sticks out from my leg.

720)How angry my left calf gets and subsequently starts stabbing and cramping.

721)Waking up at 1 in the morning followed by 3 hours of dry retching.

722)Error code 52140.

723)The realisation that I <b><i>would</i></b> still be doing this in 20 years time.

724)That whenever there is a news broadcast involving a flood there is always at least one person cycling.

725)Spending half an hour in a queue that no-one else seens to be joining.

726)How hard it is to concentrate when there’s a dog bouncing on your foot.

727)That the human body can actually make itself ill if it sees the symptoms clearly enough.

728)That I don’t know how to cast off from a loom.

729)When as you try to make a present for someone you suddenly have your “perfectionist” head on.

730)That for some reason it is cheaper to travel from Plymouth to Looe than it is from Looe to Plymouth.

731)When you eat so much maple syrup based lollies that your neck starts to cramp.

732)Being hit in the eye by giant elastic bands.

733)Sciatica.

734)Realising as you read countless web-pages on how to cast off from a loom, that you did it horribly wrong.

735)Feedback loops.

736)Knowing the words to a song until you have to sing it.

737)Yodeling.

738)Skiffle.

739)How advanced the Soviets are in the study of chaos.

740)That people I perceive as good are often the ones that suffer most.

741)People that make it blatantly obvious there is something wrong and say “Oh, nothing” when you ask them.

742)That even when I’m not concentrating I can win a game of Rummikub meaning that I have a serious advantage over other people making it unfair.

743)When I forget what number I am supposed to type.

744)When capital “I”’s look the same as lower case “l”’s.

745)Vulgarity.

746)How insane the finale to Jekyll was.

747)When I’m in a public place and I know for certain I need to madly twitch, bend over backwards and let some odd or loud noise escape my lungs.

748)Garfield.

749)When it seems I am the only one who cares about grammar.

750)When things make more sense in your head than in physical words.

751)Hearing voices.

752)Not being able to walk alongside the river as the sun breaks over the hills and through the mist.

753)The Cantor Set.

754)Being strangled by headphones.

755)Worrying that when my neck twitches violently and clicks whether I’m getting closer to snapping my spine.

756)The following sentence: <i>The course of love never did run smooth, but in your case it does.</i> being applied to me.

757)The number of blogs I have.

758)When I look back at the earlier entries and think “God, am I really so pathetic as to complain about genders?”.

759)That any picture of me makes me look:drunk, stoned, insane or a criminal.

760)Sneezes that don’t quite get pulled off.

761)Not knowing how to respond to a text sent by an adult.

762)How immature most people are.

763)How infuriatingly loud your internal monologue can become.

764)That I keep mistaking our 360 for a paper shredder.

765)When someone channel-hops continuously past the program you are actually interested in.

766)How much more productive I am when I have a lack of sleep.

767)That whenever we meet our older cousins there is always a silence through most of dinner until Ben says something and I can make him look stupid for it.

768)That I keep interpreting “Up to Half Price” as “we will charge between £0 and half of the original price.”

769)When you’re sure you recognise someone, so you walk up to them and say hello and you then realise you were horribly wrong and become embaressed.

770)People that can’t cope with my pessimistic and easily irritated brain.

771)When you need to stay up but your eyes feel so heavy that you don’t know what will happen wjen you blink.

772)When you have 2 dead legs and a dead arm and you need to walk across a landing and down some stairs to the toilet.

773)Heartburn.

774)Getting something stuck in your eye.

775)Socks that go missing when they are washed and then reappear after you’ve thrown the odd one away.

776)Burnt toast.

777)The Tellytubbies.

778)Russell Brand.

779)Sunburn.

780)Having no small change, resulting in refusal of service.

781)Skips in CD’s.

782)Traffic jams that take forever to get out of and at the other end there is no obstruction.

783)Crazy Frog.

784)People who have their phones off.

785)Novelty ring tones.

786)Junk Mail.

787)People that don’t clean up after their dog.

788)Standing in what should have been cleaned up.

789)That Bebo imposes a 50,000 character limit on a blog.

790)People who pretend to know what they’re on about but really have no idea whatsoever.

791)Skinny people who complain of being fat.

792)That Diamond and/or Pearl has no opening sequence.

793)That Bebo provides no opportunity to rearrange the order of Blogs.

794)How pathetic this part of the blog looks in the grand scheme of things.

795)When you know something is wrong in your head etc. but you have no idea what the problem is.

796)People who park in a disabled space, but aren’t disabled.

797)Milk that has gone off.

798)Queue jumpers.

799)James Blunt.

800)Poverty.

801)That very few places actually sell ONM.

802)Trying to peel carrots in Cooking Mama.

803)Realising how badly I sing.

804)Knowing that working really hard at something now will pay off later but the working hard makes you want to give up.

805)Having spent half an hour copying and pastong bits of code, the page crashes and then reloads in a normal way.

806)The amount of trouble I had transferring the data.

807)When you feel that something is completely your fault even though there is no evidence for that to be so.

808)That I am more scared of the motionless cows than the people with chainsaws and pitchforks on Resident Evil 4.

809)The voice that keeps saying “Resident Evil….4!!”.

810)How difficult it is to make popcorn on “Cooking Mama”.

811)Not knowing where my hits are coming from.

812)That, now that I’ve finished Cooking Mama, I don’t know what to do since I’ve gotten stuck in RE4.

813)My voice.

814)How hard it is to cut through frozen chocolate.

815)That my “My Documents” folder keeps crashing.

816)The pink screen of death.

817)When I forget that I’ve told someone something then tell them again somewhere else.

818)Not knowing more than 2 exam results.

819)Having to wear shorts.

820)When someone doesn’t want to go to sleep because the lights aren’t working.

821)The idea that all JoCo fans are geeks to some degree, and the subsequent theory that is tagged with geeks that they are better lovers and have seen all the evils of the internet.

822)Valentine’s Day.

823)That the font on this page keeps changing.

824)That every time I type anything the page temporarily crashes.

825)The fact that the mouse has little buttons on the side for moving Forward and Back but I keep getting confused thinking that they are the left and right click things.

826)How far behind you get by missing 2 days on a forum.

827)Something to do with George Harman.

828)Jamie Glazier.

829)The prospect that all I am is the result of high copper levels in the blood.

830)The sudden increase in views. Grrrr.

831)That I can’t afford MySims.

832)The News.

833)People who avoid the main, generally critical point, of my questions.

834)That only after 16 years do I now have a true reason why I don’t want to have sex or get married.

835)Not being able to listen to music.

836)People that can’t grasp the concept that nothing exists for certain.

837)Running.

838)Running out of things to say.

839)When you do something to make things better and it gets so much worse.

840)High School Musical (1 and 2), and if I said it before I don’t care because it’s twice as irritating, since there are two of them.

841)Balamory.

842)Sarcasm.

843)The sound of nails on boards.

844)Halitosis

845)That the network keeps shutting down computers.

846)No one reads or cares about my blog. olol. (M.B.)

847)The pathetically small white box you somehow have to fit your signature into.

848)Trying to understand the idea of an infinitely perfect imperfection.

849)How easy it is for me to get caught up on wording, so much so that I miss the point.

850)When people don’t realise that you want to be left alone. Or you don’t want them in particular there.

851)That I managed to leave this place for so long.

852)When one incident makes you question all that you’ve worked for.

853)The postal service.

854)Seagulls.

855) That it’s taken almost a year to re-format this page so you can read it.

856)Working for much longer than you should but making less progress than others.

857)That there is no such thing as the “Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device”

858)When your mind leaves it’s state of calm and goes mad and screechy for many months.

859)How I imagine Miss Holliday’s description of the Ancient Greeks view of hysteria.

860)Not understanding the hilarity of showers of gold-it’s a heavy metal it’d hurt a lot, wait…that is quite funny…

861)Wondering if seeing a god in it’s true form will really set you on fire.

862)Teachers who don’t accept the health benefits of a Wii.

863)When your “F” key keeps failing.

864)That whilst taping pens to your hands may prevent you from throwing pens across the room and smashing them, it does mean you have an immobile hand for almost 6 hours, and look a fool.

865)When people are wrong on the internet.

866)The constant lack of an EU release date for Super Smash Bros. Brawl…But at least we get Mario Kart Wii first you damned Americans! Muahahaha!

867)My infinite disability at any video game, but my unknown insistence on continuing to play, even when I get so annoyed with myself I want to break lots and lots of things.

868)People who say “Good God” or “Oh my God” when they don’t believe in God. Myself included.

869)Plans.

870)How much I reveal about my subconscious, subconsciously, on the internet.

871)How far behind I allowed this to get.

872)Fluttery-Stabby-Chest feelings. Seems to be a lot of it around lately, and by that I mean one other person has claimed it also.

873)That I’m suddenly explaining myself.

874)Never knowing if custard bubbles can develop an indestructable skin.

875)Opinion based exams with right and wrong answers.

876)Hallucinating being shot in a public toilet.

877)Ben.

878)That nobody tells you eggs explode when you boil them.

879)That I left this for so long.

880)That Twitter doesn’t tell me when I’ve gotten a reply.

881)My lack of skills and achievements to put on a CV.

882)Chain Mails.

883)Major browser issues that cripple a machine on start up.

884)Having to have someone else point out errors.

885)When a piece of text is so large that the search function breaks.

886)When I know there are still format issues, but I can’t find them due to scroll lag.

887)When people think I have an incredibly “posh” voice.

888)Lib Dems.

889)The NHS.

890)Gas prices.

891)Instead of sleeping, spending the entire night coming up with “Not even Master Yoda has an XYZ that high!” lines.

892)That in theory this list should be over 3000 posts by now, but clearly isn’t.

893)Even though I seem to always make them upset, most people I know don’t hate me.

894)That I never seem to improve at Grifball.

895)The insistence people have that the LHC will destroy us all. At least now it’s delayed until christmas.

896)That “Chocolate Rain” isn’t actually a type of rain made of chocolate.

897)People who take comments as literally as I do.

898)That the spell-checker has in fact completely given up.

899)When you ask someone what the acceptable minimum characters for a document is (when the max is 4000) and they say that the min. should be 4000.

900)Woo! 900 entries (probably 850 if you remove repeats…). You want an actual complaint? Fine…

Even though my “alias” is Jon Who, JonWho returns more results in Google. Don’t do it, most of it is rubbish anyway…

901)Knowing what people stuck into Google to get here.

902)Being too scared to know what limits the “Keep this page private” tab does…

903)Inconsistencies in Heroes.

904)That XKCD’s YouTube virus isn’t real.

905)How much logic you lose when watching a Japanese sub when you look away for 20 seconds.

906)That I can’t remember the name of the sedatives I was given. Lousy amnesia fluid. (all I know is it began with N and House uses it a lot.)

907)How obsessive I get over finishing an anime series.

908)I suck at lip syncing.

909)The logistical issues of setting up an XBox, TV and laptop so that someone can play a game via a webcam.

910)That I have no idea why the T is underlined.

911)That no-one uses 01189998819991197253 as a phone number.

912)That due to a governmental screw up I’m not going to get back payments on my EMA, and I need £60 pretty much now (but if you read this after halloween, I needed it then)

913)The temptation to buy useless but hilarious objects from electronics stores.

914)That I have more music than I have time to listen to-even during the summer.

915)When I use the same emphatic word twice in the same sentence “Actually I ought to do that actually”.

916)That someone decided to put commas and full stops next to each other on the keyboard and make them so small on screen that it’s hard to tell the difference.

917)Morning sneezes.

918)That first MC Loud got rid of his awesome hair, and then his awesomer beard.

919)That I don’t know anyone with heterochromia.

920)Not being able to remember the difference between homophones and homonyms.

921)The immense amount of work it takes to get an essay going and to keep it going.

922)How much harder it is when a particular essay is incredibly vague.

923)Guardians of the tower. *Hiss*

924)That I can’t find anything to do on the internet.

925)When your computer plays music with no music player open.

926)That whenever I asked to be woken up by a certain time, no one wakes up until an hout later.

927)The number of people who tell me “You need a new girlfriend. NOW!”

928)People who ask if I listen to any “normal” music. More specifically, music that doesn’t have a story.

929)When people deem me as unfriendly because I asked what someone wants, doing that and then saying goodbye.

930)Hostels that won’t let you enter unless you’re 18 or with a guardian. However they don’t specify what counts as a guardian.

940)When given half a chance I will spend an entire weekend watching anime.

932)That my ability to follow number patterns has gone out the window.

933)Knowing I’m wasting my time when I read this myself.

934)The number of things I want to buy from ThinkGeek and IWOOT (and XKCD actually…)

935)How wrong periods look after brackets.

936)When two (or more girls) sit in a bath tub talking about something, which they obviously all know about and so they don’t actually explain anything properly leaving you confused as to waht it’s all about…

938)The number of entries that begin with “that”.

939)Worrying if Spidey was hurt at any moment during his presentationising.

940)The looks people gave me after I mentioned that there was only one issue in “The most misogonystic speech EVAR!” (I would include an mp3 link, but I’ve no where to host it) and that being that buying babies from a temple is hard if there are no women. And not just because it’s the women that shop. {I like to dig holes}

941)When school moves deadlines forward by a week (making something due the next day), panicking to get it done, and then the day after handing it all in, they tell us not to panic and that we have until next week.

942)When the school tells you your application is invalid because they didn’t point something out to you, tell you they’ll send it back so you can fix it, and you still don’t have it back when the deadline is tomorrow.

943)*Green squiggly line* “Fragment (Consider revising)”. There is never any helpful advice at this point, no one knows what this statement means. It’s useless…

944)That speakers for mp3 players only seem to exist for iPods.

945)When you make a bear and it looks like it will devour your soul when you aren’t looking.

946)When no matter what you do, 8 stitches always doubles up to 14.

947)How long it takes me to realise there’s a needle in my back.

948)People who call me Scrooge for preferring Boxing Day over Christmas Day.

949)People who call it Xmas.

950)Receiving texts in the middle of the night which ask if I’m asleep.

951)Cold hands.

952)People that think shouting at a charging bull will stop it.

953)When discussions about who in a group of people is most like someone from a group of tv people turn nasty once one person can’t be categorised.

954)The frequency with which Windows Live Mail receives my googlemail, but not my hotmail.

955)The flood.

956)Meta-achievements.

957)That Excel has no way to auto update calculations within it other than by pressing F9.

958)That I’ve listened to the same songs non-stop for 4 days now, well, except for when eating.

959)When I feel bored enough to read this post.

960)How far behind the predicted list length I actually am, by now it should be nearing 400 000.

961)When I know I’ll have enough money spare, but still can’t decide between a Z-Pen and a 1.5TB external harddrive.

962)Raj centered BBT stories.

963)The number of anime’s I’m watching at once, and thus confusing storylines.

964)People who respect people all colours of the rainbow. Sure the Oompa Loompa’s will be happy (though originally black) but where are the rest of us in the rainbow?

965)Watching everyone else read books, and not being able to do so.

966)That it’s only when the exam is an hour away that you feel like you know nothing.

967)Hypocrites.

968)Not knowing whether 967 is accurately spelt.

969)Sentences that confuse “affect” and “effect”.

970)Knowing that the time between me swallowing something the wrong way, and choking is 3 seconds. Or until I try to swallow something else.

971)Not being able to lick down envelopes.

972)How bad glue has gotten at gluing things.

973)People who think I’m ignorant for not wanting to donate organs.

974)Puzzles which involve multiple people and one or more of them is lying, where you have to find the liar.

975)That the longer this list gets, the harder it is to think of something that is not a repeat. (I bet that is)

976)Inconsistencies within film.

977)When Facebook asks you “Who smells nicer?”. First off, it seems to give me two people I’ve never met, secondly, when I do know them, it’s not like I go around sniffing people. I’m not a dog.

978)That WordPress’ obsessive need to save drafts increases the amount of time I can’t actually write anything.

979)How easily carried away I can get when commenting on something on Facebook.

980)When I can’t check to see if I have £360 because the bank’s website won’t load my balance.

981)The terror and joy I feel the closer I get to post number 1000).

982)The large amount of name dropping and monotonous battles in the Aeneid.

983)How hard it it to record audio with only the inbuilt mic of the computer.

984)Knowing that a petabyte is enough for about 164 years of music, and wanting to get that much.

985) That now I only regularly frequent 5 websites on the whole internet.

986)Subbed vs Dubbed arguments all end up going the same way, and yet dubbed still exists.

987)The unshakable feeling that I might be in the wrong era.

988)The frequency to which Fable 2 breaks.

989)When, after looking at a backwards clock for a week, you can’t read a regular clock.

990)Being asked “Who would make a better mother?” out fo two men.

991)That the more time progresses the more things I become oblivious to, due to their being caused by things I was oblivious to earlier.

992)How often I have to put the same e-mail into the Junk folder.

993)People who claim you can’t comprehend infinite regression, but that you can comprehend an infinitely powerful and loving creator.

994)When you sew yourself to a quilt.

995)Shirts that don’t reach far enough to be tucked in effectively.

996)How 80% of chemistry questions suddenly seem to have the same answer.

997)When dreams are too real, and thus you live as though they had happened, and you get a huge mess.

998)Umbrellas.

999)The number of times I can suddenly realise the same thing.

1000)That I feel both smug and pathetic for thinking of 1000 (give or take a few) things that annoy me.

1001)Relationship anniversaries. Why celebrate the fact that two people in “love” haven’t broken up yet?

1002)That Google Groups don’t have the sense to let the url BB code work.

1003)How much owning a debit card screws up my finances.

1004)That infinity theoretically forms a loop but it’s not a loopp because else it’s finite, but in order to be able to come back on itself it logically has to be a loop.

1005)Background noise.

1006)Coke that tastes of rubber.

1007)When you specifically ask for a diet coke with no ice, and they serve you a regular coke with half a cup of ice.

1008)The severe lag that is caused just by me adding a new etry.

1009) The temptation to record the first 1000 entries as an audiofile in one sitting.

1010)Waking up at three in the morning regardless of when I go to sleep, and not being able to get off again until at least five.

1011)Seeing just how many Facebook statuses I make.

1012)Being  an either entirely thinky or  feely person.

1013)That I feel the need to get to at least 1111 entries just so that it’s a nice number.

1014)The 9 fold human being.

1015)That since starting the Steiner course, whenever someone mentions the words soul or spirit I feel compelled to ask which one.

1016)Having a plan for a meeting the day before, but 30 minutes before the meeting falling apart and arguing what needs to be said.

1017)Seeing everyone connected to MSN on the University wi-fi and not being able to work out how to do it.